Friday, 27 November 2015

How do we deal with rules?

Now that Jake is officially over the baby phase, Luke and I have begun to see some changes. The toddler years are upon us and we are desperately trying to fathom the best course of action where our son's behaviour is concerned. 

Jake is a cheeky chap. He is bright and inquisitive. He has to press every button, pull every cord and throw any solid or food-related object. These things are all cute and adorable... for about 5 minutes! Now? Well, now they are getting frustrating and embarrassing - especially if we're out when he does this.

We're crossing a fine line at the moment between letting Jake discover and play versus trying to find the lines that need to be drawn in order for us to enforce some rules and behaviour. But is it too early? 

Part of me thinks yes. It feels too early to try to reprimand Jake for misbehaving - I do that all day every day as a teacher with 11 to 16 year olds and even then some of them struggle with the concept! 

The other part of me feels that now is the right time to start behaviour management. If we don't start making a point of showing Jake things aren't appropriate, then it will get harder to do as he gets older.

The point is - I don't know the answer. Is it yes or no? And how do we go about doing this? I don't want to shout at him or smack him at this point (though when he slapped my step dad we shouted at him!) but what other ways are there to enforce rules with an almost 15 month old child? 

I would love to hear your views, opinions and advice! What tips do you have? What can we do to support Jake in his exploration of the world? 



  1. I found that a lot of the behaviour management you use at school works well. Making sure you use consequence that you will follow through and are suitable. From quite little, we used a simple counting warning. N, by the time I count to 5, you need to ***** or else ******. It might be - "by the time I count to 5, you need to leave that alone, otherwise I will move you away etc." If he did it before 5, LOTS of praise and if he didn't, follow through with what you said. ALWAYS follow through. It might only give you 5/10 seconds of gap before doing what you would need to do anyway, but it starts to give an idea of consequences. The praise is really important. My N, from about Jake's age, pretty much did as asked each time we did this. It's not perfect, but it's an easy start and also one that family etc that are also 'parenting' can easily copy. Tone of voice helps too. Good Luck!

  2. Amazing advice and totally makes sense. I will definitely try this! Thanks so so so much xxxx