Sunday, 24 January 2016

Do Good - Be Positive

Stop and think. 

When was the last time someone thanked you for that meal you cooked? Or replied gratefully to that helpful and supportive tweet you sent? When did your boss last acknowledge that you'd gone above and beyond, again, at work? All of us have a moment in our life where we'd like to be noticed, to be appreciated or to be acknowledged for the things we do. It is human nature - we all feel like this at one time or another. But how often do you say thank you to those around you? 

The people we surround ourselves with are vital cogs in our lives. They help us get through the day, the week, the month. Without them we would be alone. Without them things would be even more difficult. By showing your appreciation you can help them to feel good about who they are and in turn, they can help people around them feel good too. 

I have decided not to set any resolutions this year. Instead, I just want to try and be more positive about life, about myself and about my situations. I am starting by stopping and saying 'Thank you' to a few key people. 

Thank you to Luke. You're a wonderful father and a supportive husband. Thanks for all that you do. 

Thanks to my mum for helping support me and my little family. 

Thanks to the rest of my family and friends for the love and support. 

Who will you say thank you to?


Sunday, 10 January 2016

You Just Don't Understand

I have spent a week questioning whether or not I should publish this. In the end I've decided that it reflects how I feel, even a week on. So I'm going to take the inevitable 'flack' and post.

Here goes...

Last Sunday night - on Instagram - I saw a mum post this comment: 

''I go to work for the adult conversation and nothing more''. 

Quite frankly lady - it ends in 'off' and starts with 'f...'. 

On the evening before so many of us mums and dads were returning to work - if we hadn't already - (some full, some part time) to post something that sounds so arrogant and insensitive got my back up. I exploded into a tirade of bubbling anger as I explained to Luke what I'd seen. It ruffled my feathers, poked at my sore spot and poured alcohol on the flames of feelings about returning to work. 

I hate to say this bold statement. But I am going to say it. 

You well-off stay at home parents just DON'T understand. 

There. I said it. 

I open myself up to the flood of hate and ranting people who dominate the parenting world of blogging and Twitter to slate me, unfollow me, moan about me etc. But you know what - you just DON'T get it. 

I know this doesn't apply to everyone. I am not doing a 'Katie Hopkins blanket blame' statement. Many, many parents out there who now stay at home DO understand and empathise with those of us forced to continue to work full/part time (for whatever the reason). Many of those parents are decent, supportive and sensitive human beings who have the maturity to understand; after all, we all have our problems and challenges to deal with - whatever they may be. 

But, there are a good many parents who simply don't understand what it is like to HAVE to work. To have to give your child to family or childcare so that you can pay the bills. So that you can manage. So that your little one doesn't go without. You simply don't know the guilt that hollows into your stomach and reaches up to wrap around your heart every morning as you have to leave and want nothing more to be with your child all day. To be the one that picks them up when they cry for you because they fell over, or whatever they need. 

Luke and I are very lucky that Jake spends time with his Nanny as part of his childcare. We're also very lucky that he seems to really enjoy the three mornings a week he is at nursery and plays with other children. The guilt has gotten easier as time has gone on and we see how settled Jake is in to his routine.

I know there are many other parents out there who are worse off than us in lots of ways, and my heart goes out to them as I empathise with their struggles.

Perhaps all of us could try to be a little more thoughtful, 'eh?